The Cartographer’s Apprentice

Roll up roll up roll up. We proudly present the Cartographer’s apprentice, the finest work of fiction every to see the light of day in these benighted times. Do I ask ten pounds? Do I ask five pounds? Do I ask one pound? No, to you lady, the one with the bright light of intelligence in her eyes; and to you sir, yes you Sir, the distinguished looking gent with the illustrious countenance; I ask only Ninety-Nine pence.
I know, I’m cutting my own throat at that, but lord love us, you’ve got a lucky face. So there you have it. Four short stories from the Land of the Three Seas casting a light on the early career of Benor Dorfinngil. The trials and tribulations of a young cartographer; this book features duels, savage halfmen, gassy beer, blood feuds and most dangerous of all, beautiful women.

And all this for 99p; why that’s over four hundred words for a penny. And not just any old words may I tell you. These are bespoke, handcrafted words. Words chosen carefully by some of our finest young lexicographers, arranged in order, the punctuation supplied by renown exponents of their art, hammered in the forge of Hephaestus and tempered by immersion, still red hot from the anvil, into blushful Hippocrene.
And the electrons, look at the book, browse the text, and revel in the excellence of the electrons. Look at the quality of their intrinsic angular momentum, marvel at their invariant mass. All electrons are supplied with a written guarantee that they have no known substructure.
Cannot do better than that squire; just wander along to

Also available as pdf, and a score of other interesting formats, a quick google search will provide them all.


The Cartographers Apprentice


5 thoughts on “The Cartographer’s Apprentice

  1. marilynmonruaux September 24, 2013 at 6:56 pm Reply

    Why do we writers do so much for so little? Sounds like a great read…

    • jwebster2 September 24, 2013 at 8:53 pm Reply

      Because we’re warm wonderful human beings? 🙂

  2. M T McGuire September 24, 2013 at 9:07 pm Reply

    Thank you Cut me own throat Dibbler for writing today’s post! 😉 I’ve bought it.

    Sits smugly.



    • jwebster2 September 24, 2013 at 10:08 pm Reply

      Well I had to get in a tribute to one of the greats 🙂 Glad you bought it, hope you like it

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