River of gold

Get yourself some easy money, come on, fill your boots, there’s plenty for everybody. Roll up, roll up and get rich quick.

Too good to be true? Nonsense, get your nose in the trough before the other beggars hog it all.


I came across one of the best money making schemes I’ve ever seen entirely by accident. I was just chatting to a bloke. He drives a low-loader; he delivers tracked diggers onto site for the company he works for and he wasn’t entirely happy.

The previous week he’d driven the low-loader plus digger all the way from darkest south Lancashire up to Whitehaven, which is pretty much at the other edge of the world for him. He’d arrived on site and had been met by his boss with the words.

“Don’t need it yet, they’re not ready.”

“When did you know this?”

“Oh three or four hours ago.” “

“Then why the hell didn’t you phone me, I needn’t have come up here.”

“Oh, I thought you’d enjoy the ride out.”

The end result was that he was told to take the digger back and fetch it back up tomorrow. When asked what he was supposed to do when he got back he was told, “Oh just tidy the yard up a bit.”
Now he reckons that with one thing and another, it cost £240 to do the round trip. If the boss had told him to spend the night in a Whitehaven B&B he could have sampled the wild nightlife of this hidden northern metropolis, and he’d still have had change out of £60.

So I asked why his company was so inefficient. He just shrugged. “It’s the same since they started building these wind turbines all over the place.” I talked to another guy who works for a different company. His comment was “There’s so much money being poured into them now our finance people don’t know how much to charge any more.”

His language got colourful, and I’ll try and give a bowdlerised version. People are setting up companies to get contracts with landowners to build turbines. They’re selling the contracts on to other companies before the ink is even dry, and these other companies consist of little more than one person, a telephone and a copy of the yellow pages. Split the job up into portions, put the portions out to tender. Oh yes, and you need a sack to catch the money as it rolls in and a shovel to spread it around amongst the subcontractors.


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4 thoughts on “River of gold

  1. M T McGuire December 15, 2013 at 11:56 pm Reply

    It’s a mugs game being an author. I should be ‘project managing’ a building project.

  2. jwebster2 December 16, 2013 at 7:47 am Reply

    That’s the way I see it as well. The advantage of writing is whilst it’s a damned poor hourly rate, it isn’t a bad return on capital 😉

  3. keirarts December 24, 2013 at 7:41 am Reply

    Sounds good, I’m in!!!

    • jwebster2 December 24, 2013 at 11:08 am Reply

      Hey, with that phone of yours you can probably organise the engineering at the same time you check your Amazon store 🙂

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