The weather is wet! We’ve not seen the sun for three days and everything is just utterly grey and sodden. It’s the sort of weather where cattle get pneumonia and sheep just look depressed. They see you coming and shake themselves in a pointed manner, with great clouds of water coming off their fleece.

The air is so saturated with water that it just runs down the building walls. Now is the time that really tests your electrical insulation! I remember once seeing our electrician using his test equipment on various circuits to try and find where there was a fault. The walls were so wet because of the endless drizzle that he could touch the wall in any two places with the equipment and get a measurable current between his crocodile clips.

Just to put the tin hat on everything, we’ve not had proper daylight for three days either. We’ve been living our days in perpetual evening gloom. Although it’s mild enough, grass has stopped growing, personally I suspect it just cannot see the point.

It’s at times like this I’m glad I don’t have a lot of cattle inside. At some point you have slurry to dispose of and at the moment the ground is so waterlogged that nobody in their right mind would take a tractor onto it. It reminds me of the occasion a few years ago when I was talking to one of the contractors.

He’d been to one farm which desperately needed the slurry pit emptying and the cunning plan was to use his big tanker to blow the slurry from the lane, over the hedge into the field. No vehicles needed to go into the field, so you didn’t damage the soil.

He’d blown three loads over the hedge before he noticed that water was running back onto the lane from off the field. At that point they decided on plan B. This was to blow over the opposite side of the lane because at least that way the ground sloped away from the road and if anything it would spread better.

As a technique, blowing slurry over the hedge from the road in the pouring rain tends to be frowned upon nowadays. In one case I remember the tractor driver obviously had his attention more on the road than the tanker spout, and managed to deluge one of the electrical transformers on a roadside pole. Given that a slurry tanker can quite happily put out over 500 gallons a minute, there was a bang and a quite spectacular light show. Then all the power went off.

Apparently the Electricity people were deluged by phone calls, the power had gone off just as the Jeremy Kyle show (or whatever) was about to get utterly sensational, and the people who rang in were apparently most vituperative. Or so I was told by the three lads who came round from the Lecky board with a tank of water and a pressure hose to wash the transformer off before switching the electricity back on. They thought it was hilarious, Daytime TV washed away in a shower of slurry. To them it seemed entirely appropriate.


And for those miserable wet days

As a reviewer commented, “What starts off looking like a theft at sea, followed by a several findings in the mud when the tide is out, soon morphs into an intriguing tale where Benor, Tallis, Shena, Mutt, and a plethora of other folks, get involved in dealing with dark deeds in Port Naain.”

Tagged: , , , , ,

34 thoughts on “Wet!

  1. Annette Rochelle Aben December 21, 2017 at 4:27 pm Reply

    Sending you sunshine for Christmas! Happy Christmas to you, and those who mean the most to you!!

    • jwebster2 December 21, 2017 at 4:32 pm Reply

      many thanks, according to the forecast, Christmas day might be our first day the sun gets out 🙂
      All the best to you and yours

  2. oldhenwife December 21, 2017 at 4:51 pm Reply

    We went to a shop today, parked behind it where the drains were being – being what I didn’t ask.I didn’t breathe going down the alley between the car park and the shop fronts.

    It wasn’t cattle slurry. I remember daytime television, probably before JK whoever he is was born. Back in the 70s. Didn’t keep the set long.

    It’s gloomy and wet laden here too. No 1 grandson and wife went to York to celebrate their wedding anniversary, they thought it might be brighter. But York is like this even in high summer. The Plain is bound by hills, nothing can get out without climbing and water doesn’t do that.

    • jwebster2 December 21, 2017 at 5:01 pm Reply

      yes, parts of York flood with monotonous regularity!
      And sewage stinks far worse than anything cattle ever produced

  3. Sue Vincent December 21, 2017 at 5:02 pm Reply

    I’m inclined to agree with the lads from the electricity board…
    If it is any consolation, the south is pretty much just as bad at the moment.
    Happy Christmas, Jim.

    • jwebster2 December 21, 2017 at 5:03 pm Reply

      yes, it struck me that they’d hit the nail pretty firmly on the head 🙂
      I suppose shared misery is some consolation 😉

      • Sue Vincent December 21, 2017 at 5:05 pm

        But at least you have hills… 😉

      • jwebster2 December 21, 2017 at 5:36 pm

        that’s true, plus the sea, a big estuary and a quite amazing amount of sky 🙂

      • Sue Vincent December 21, 2017 at 5:38 pm

        *gnashing of teeth from exile down south…* 🙂

      • jwebster2 December 21, 2017 at 5:43 pm

        you’ll have to come home to civilised lands. Just sell a dog kennel down there and buy a county up here 🙂

      • Sue Vincent December 21, 2017 at 5:53 pm

        If I owned the kennel, I would. As it is… I just need to find a job up there 🙂

      • jwebster2 December 21, 2017 at 8:03 pm

        I know somebody who moved from being NHS admin in London to temporary bar staff in the NE and they ended up with a higher disposable income after rent etc 🙂

      • Sue Vincent December 21, 2017 at 8:07 pm

        I know… and I’ll do pretty much anything to get back north 🙂

      • jwebster2 December 21, 2017 at 8:28 pm

        what sort of work are you looking for?

      • Sue Vincent December 21, 2017 at 8:38 pm

        Pretty much anything that allows me to live. I’ve done everything from cleaning to senior management with a charity to transport management and driving a white van 🙂

      • jwebster2 December 21, 2017 at 8:46 pm
      • Sue Vincent December 21, 2017 at 9:15 pm

        I was on there earlier 😉

      • jwebster2 December 21, 2017 at 9:19 pm

        hope you find something soon 🙂

      • Sue Vincent December 21, 2017 at 9:49 pm

        When the time is right, I will 🙂

      • jwebster2 December 22, 2017 at 8:07 am

        Hopefully you’ll not be exiled for much longer 🙂

      • Sue Vincent December 22, 2017 at 8:23 am

        Just waiting for my son to no longer require my services… 🙂

      • jwebster2 December 22, 2017 at 8:56 am

        ah well, at least it’s good to be wanted 🙂

      • Sue Vincent December 22, 2017 at 2:59 pm

        ‘want’ may be too strong a word 😉

      • jwebster2 December 22, 2017 at 5:13 pm


      • Sue Vincent December 22, 2017 at 5:20 pm


  4. rugby843 December 21, 2017 at 5:42 pm Reply

    Another great story. Hope your weather changes soon. Happy holidays!

    • jwebster2 December 21, 2017 at 5:43 pm Reply

      glad you liked it, all the best 🙂

  5. Alicia Butcher Ehrhardt December 21, 2017 at 7:24 pm Reply

    Slurry. Ah, that’s not what I thought slurry was. The engineering term has no input from cattle. The things I learn from you.

    • jwebster2 December 21, 2017 at 7:27 pm Reply

      cattle slurry is also pretty close to being a slurry in engineering terms as well. Basically it’s because it’s been pounded and mixed by cattle walking through it

      • Alicia Butcher Ehrhardt December 21, 2017 at 7:45 pm

        I never attached a smell to the concept before today. Wish I hadn’t.

      • jwebster2 December 21, 2017 at 8:02 pm

        Into each life a little rain must fall 😉

  6. M T McGuire December 23, 2017 at 2:46 pm Reply

    Loved the line about the grass not growing because it can’t see the point. 😉 good post – gave me a chuckle. Happy Christmas. 🙂

    • jwebster2 December 23, 2017 at 3:04 pm Reply

      All the best, hope you have a good one with family
      And remember, ‘Just William’ audio books for McMini 🙂

      • M T McGuire December 23, 2017 at 3:06 pm

        Yes! Thank you. 😉

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: